Tuesday, April 26, 2011

5 Ways to Benefit from Your Haters

How to Rise Above Your Rivalries - 5 ways to benefit from your haters.

Whether it was for academic or non-academic clubs throughout middle school to high school to the end of my college career, there is one thing I can say that is pretty consistent - there are always silent or overt haters, within, outside, around.

We all know it's important to manage personal relations, and often times it is much easier to just say I don't care so I'll let them be. With clubs/brands/companies however, it is important to acknowledge your rivalries, and use them to your advantage. 

I am of course no expert in mediation, but here's what I got from all of it.

It is inevitable to have disputes and rivalries, but how do you make the best of them?

"A man with no enemies is a man with no character." - Paul Newman

1. First of all, be PROUD that you have rivalries. 
- This means that you are probably good enough for someone to be jealous of (, or just really good at being a total jerk...). You stood up for your point of view, but now you find others who disagree. You've set a standard for others, and now everyone wants to step all over it and rise above you. Now what?

"If you can learn to love yourself and all the flaws, you can love other people so much better"- Kristin Chenoweth

2. Everyone has flaws. Time to find out what yours are.
Everyone has flaws, and ignoring them isn't the best way to improve. You and I know that your enemies will pick you apart, from small nitsy gritsy mistakes to major loopholes in your organization or your personality. So why not ask them? They probably see it more clearly then you do.

"No man ever got very high by pulling other people down."
- Alfred Lord Tennyson

3. Don't hate back 
- Who said all disputes and rivalries have to incorporate hate? They can simply be healthy competitions that keep each other in check, to fight for improvement, to exchange ideas. The worse thing you could do is bad mouth your rivalries, it's not only unprofessional, but bad on your image. You can rise above by showing why you're BETTER, not why they're WORSE.

Don't be a hater, because that'll only get more haters around you.

"In order to know your enemy, you must become your enemy." 
- Chris Bradford

4. Find out more about them 
- What makes them our rivalry? What would they want out of this enemy-ship? Think in their shoes. What do they want from us? What makes them a worthy rivalry and not just a hater? And most importantly -What can we learn from them?

5. Finally, make friends with them. 
Pretty self explanatory, and over discussed in centuries. You get my point =].

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